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We had so much fun last week writing about hauntings in our home states, Trex and I decided to continue the theme. This time we bring you horror movies set in both Maryland and New Mexico, with minor detours to Texas (where Trex spent several years before Maryland) and Utah (where I lived for frickin’ decades before New Mexico). I’m gonna be up front, though. If this were a contest, Trex would win. Maryland and Texas both have impressive lists of classic horror to their names, while New Mexico and Utah really don’t. Still, I’m gonna work with what I’ve got.

Let’s start with Maryland, since this state is the obvious winner. Not that it’s a contest, but Maryland wins. First, it gave us The Exorcist, one of the all time classics of horror. If you somehow haven’t seen The Exorcist, or read the book it’s inspired by, or listened to any podcasts talking about it, the movie is about an exorcism. I grew up during the Satanic Panic and distinctly remember my parents gossiping on occasion about various teens being attacked by Satan and such, so I used to be terrified of possession and demonic horror. The first time I “watched” this movie at a friend’s house, my eyes were closed maybe 70% of the time. As I got older and my terror turned into fascination, the movie still held up. Even decades later, this movie evokes a deep atmosphere of dread that’s hard to beat.

As if that classic wasn’t enough, Maryland also brought us The Blair Witch Project, one of the classic “found footage” films. In a fun Utah connection, this Maryland-set movie first premiered at Utah’s Sundance Festival. When the movie first premiered, all the promos were still pretending this was a documentary. I lived in Utah at the time but I had no money and no car so I did not see the premier. I saw it much later at a local theater like everybody else. By that time, word was out that the Blair Witch was fiction and the “missing” actors were alive and well and giving interviews about the film.

And last but not least, Maryland gets a bonus point because famous cannibal Hannibal Lecter (from Silence of the Lambs and such) was part of Baltimore’s elite before he was caught and imprisoned (also in Baltimore) for killing and eating people.

New Mexico, meanwhile, is not the home of any horror classics. It is the home of remakes of horror classics. (And of Breaking Bad, which isn’t really horror even though it features a lot of murders.) New Mexico brings us Let Me In, the American remake of Sweden’s Let the Right One In. Both of them are vampire/coming of age films and they’re really really similar. Let Me In is set in 1980s Los Alamos, though that has pretty much nothing to do with anything. I’ve seen both the original and the remake and they both have their merits. Let Me In is a Hammer Film and has their signature stylish, almost poetic moments of horror. As far as the plot goes, both movies end exactly the same, but the New Mexico remake is shot better and has more drama and poignancy.

New Mexico also brings us the remake of Wes Craven’s classic The Hills Have Eyes, and with it a complaint I just can’t shake. Both movies are largely about a family lost in the desert being stalked by murderous mutants. Craven’s original was set in California and Alexandre Aja, the remake’s director, moved it to New Mexico so he could change the film’s backstory. In the remake, the villainous mutants are the result of nuclear testing and part of the film’s action takes place in one of those creepy fake towns full of mannequins built to test the damage done by bombs. It’s a good idea and adds some interest and some cool creepy visuals to Aja’s remake. My complaint is that Aja, like a lot of people, seems to have New Mexico and Nevada confused. I get it, they’re both mostly desert and they’re both famous for aliens and nuclear weapons. New Mexico is famous for inventing the atom bomb and the first test was here, but most of the above ground testing was done in Nevada, so they should have the murderous mutants. New Mexico has a bad enough reputation already. We don’t need mutants on top of it.

Okay, enough of New Mexico. It has no honorable mentions. Instead I’ll move on to Utah, where Ari Aster’s Hereditary is set. I saw Hereditary but completely forgot it was set in Utah. This one is partly a disturbing look at grief and death, and partly a disturbing look at ceremonial magic and Victorian-style occult societies. It’s a great film, a modern classic. One point for me! But it’s not a contest.

If it were a contest, Trex would reach back to her time in Texas and fire back with The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. It’s even got Texas in the name so you can’t forget where the massacre is set. Another classic, this time featuring young people finding a seemingly deserted farmhouse only to be chased and killed by the creepy chainsaw-wielding family within. One of the first big slasher films, the Chainsaw Massacre has a slew of sequels and remakes with Texas in their titles.

I’m really glad this isn’t a contest because my desolate little western states just don’t have a comeback to that one. There might not be any states as terrifying as Texas and Maryland. Trex is clearly a badass afraid of nothing to live in such places. I’ll stay out here with the sand and the nuclear mutants, thank you very much.

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